A Satirical Psalm of Praise

A man wakes up and begins to pray. He has forgotten the words and starts to ad lib. The Lord notices; “This is going to be good” he mumbles to the angels.

Man: Praise the Lord ye angels!

The Lord: All right, all right, that’s traditional.

Man: Praise the Lord, ye sun and stars!

The Lord: Beautiful, beautiful!

Man: Praise the Lord ye chirpy squirrels!

The Lord: Well, that’s original.

Man: Praise the Lord ye mountains of exactly one thousand trees!

The Lord: Hmm. I wonder about the other mountains.

Man: Praise the Lord ye adolescents with debilitating acme!

The Lord: They do need help!

Man: Praise the Lord ye sluts and whores!

The Lord: My oh my, that is… oddly fun.

The man goes back to bed, his prayers having a-lifted to heaven.

The Lord laughs; and grants the man all the wishes of his heart